Much Ado About Chickens

This is one of the first photos taken of our chickens. The object of this post is the one which is front and center. The white one, Ruth.

Remember this photo? Henny Penny and Ruth spending some quality time together. Well, here's the deal. From the get go, I've never liked Ruth. I'm sorry! I admit it! I. Don't. Like. Ruth! Something just didn't sit right with me. Now, before you get your feathers in a ruffle, I am NOT prejudiced but it bugged me that Ruth looked different then the others. She was aggressive too. I don't like aggressive. I like harmony!

Take a good look at Ruth. Anything look 'odd' to you? For all of you chicken experts out there...... remember, this is a YOUNG going to be HEN. I'll give you a hint. Look at her comb. Yeah. Thaz right. COMB! When she was new, I called the chicken farmer guy who I bought these from and told him HER comb just didn't look like the others.... Don't worry he tells me, he's been doing this for fifty years. He knows boys vs. girls and I've got a girl chicken.

I hang up the phone and am still bugged. I don't like Ruth. Ruth is obnoxious. Ruth is worse then a high school cheerleader who is full of herself. Ruth is acting more like, like a........ LIKE A HIGH SCHOOL MR. POPULAR JOCK! Struttin' around and acting all cocky. Hmmmm, why are male roosters called cocks? Why are teenage boys called cocky? Ya  foller me?

So, Saturday comes around. I'm outside and........... THE THING STARTS CROWING! I looked at Ruth all narrowed eyed and told her, "Honey! You've got gender issues"! I put Ruth in a box and drove off to the Farmer's Market. I found my chicken farmer guys and pulled Ruth out and asked if this was a rooster or a hen! A rooster....... I put "Ruth" back in the box and triumphantly ask if the head honcho chicken farmer would be home that day so I could exchange the impostor. I am assured that yes, Mr. Owner of Chickens will be home all day.

I was babysitting my darling little grand nephew that morning so it was later in the afternoon before I could box "Ruth" up again to take back to his original dwellings. I drove up. No one is home. I sit and wait an hour. I won't bore you with the details but it involved me waiting a long time, throwing "Ruth" back in with the other chickens at the farm and driving home only to return a few hours later for my what I hope is going to be a hen this time.

Are you bored with my story yet? Let me tell you! If someone had told me before that I would spend so much time observing chickens and lose sleep over them I'd have told them they were nuts! If they'd told me I'd spend the entire weekend with my nose two inches from the chicken wire watching to make sure the new hen (who we think is adorable by the way) would survive the pecking order ordeal I'd have told them they were crackers!

If someone would have told me I'd be taking Mildred, (Levi's chicken, the naked neck vulture looking one) and would be putting her in time out because she won't quit pecking the new Ruth, I'd have told you, you were insane! By the way, Mildred is in time out this very moment....... again. Personally, I think she feels inferior with her lack of feathers on her neck and is quite jealous of Ruth's plumage...... they being teenagers and all.

I know what it is like! I started going grey in high school! I kid you not! If I were a teenager going bald...... well....... I'd probably want to peck the popular captain of the cheer team too! Especially if she was blond and had great hair.

If someone had told me that I'd go and check on the chickens and find our new one missing and then in a frantic search all over the yard would find this in the front yard......... I'd have told them that they were probably and most likely right.

I promise. It isn't a dead rubber chicken. It's just two girls taking an afternoon siesta. P.S. Notice the comb.......?? Looks much more henish doesn't it.