Bologna. Does NOT look like it sounds.
Yesterday I wandered into the kitchen. My stomach was doing that thing. You know, where it has waited long enough and if you don't hurry and feed it NOW it will throw itself out of your throat onto the nearest edible calorie ridden forbidden item it can find.
I opened the fridge and saw a package of bologna in the crisper. I was delighted! I snatched it up and was instantly back to when I was a kid and peanut butter and jelly on homemade wheat bread was pretty much the daily special for lunch. Reeeeal special. I got tired of special.
Every once in a blue moon, mom would splurge and buy bologna. I loved bologna. One day, I decided to use my super sneaky wonder kid skills. I kyped the bologna and hid it! I hid it under the foot stool in the family room. No one would find it there. The stool had a skirt around the base, I was small enough to fit under the stool and so that is where I hid with my bologna.
I took out a slice and slowly pulled off the red plastic from around the sides. This was my favorite part! Some of the bologna always stayed stuck to the plastic and if it didn't, well, I made sure it did! I would then put the plastic in my mouth and slide it through my teeth pulling off the stuck bologna.
Heaven! Until mum came looking for me. I left my hiding place and found my mom sporting a look of innocence on my face. I was sent off to do who knows what. All I know, is the bologna that was secretly hidden under the footstool......was forgotten....
Until, one fine morning, one of my sisters moved the footstool....
Fuzzy green stuff covered the precious buried treasure! How could I have forgotten? And who knew that stuff was supposed to be refrigerated??? I was devastated. No thanks to my sisters who howled with laughter at me either.
I remembered this yesterday, as I took out a slice, pulled off the red plastic, making sure some of the bologna stuck to it, and held between two fingers, I tilted back my head and pulled the plastic through my teeth pulling off the bologna.