This is a true story. The names have been changed to protect the innocent.
A few weeks ago, Miss K came to me and declared that she knew what she wanted to be for Halloween and would I help her make a costume. It has been a long time since I've gone full hog on pulling out the sewing machine, spending hours, days, weeks, on yanking out my hair and making homemade costumes for The Native's.
I told Henny Penny that yes, I'd make her a costume. Not just any costume mind you. She wanted to be the bumble bee fairy from the book "Fable Haven". I told her that finding bumble bee fabric might be a tidge hard but we'd go to the fabric store and see what we could find.
Off to the fabric store we went. JoAnne's. It has been years since I've bought fabric from JoAnne's for several reasons. We'll leave it at: It has been years since I've bought fabric from JoAnne's. The last time I did, the fabric was $1.99, $2.99...... a yard.
The first aisle we came to was loaded with fairy wings. Bedazzled Henny Penny and I started to lay them all out so we could see each one. Henny Penny decided the bumble bee fairy was stupid. She wanted to be the purple fairy. And then we saw, the green fairy wings with the purple glitter so it was decided, a multi colored fairy.
We grabbed the wings and set off to go and look at patterns. None on sale. Of course. We thumbed through the pattern books. I made snorty disgusted noises and comments under my breath about how all of the adult costumes looked like floozies and hookers.
Finally! We found THEEEEEE pattern. A beautiful fairy dress with several layers of flowy fabric in the skirt.
Next! The fabric! Off we went going up and down the aisles looking at the fabric.....touching....... oooohhhing..... "Look at this one!".
Fabric was found and as each of the six fabrics were put into my cart, warning alarm number 1 somehow got mis directed and if it rang. I didn't hear it. I saw the price of the fabric.... but it didn't register.
We stand in line waiting for our fabric to be cut. People are passing our cart and oooohing at our fabric and, "What are you going to make with that??"
The fabric, all six colors gets cut out. Yards and yards upon yards of it. Wow! That's a lot of fabric. Warning alarm number 2. Lots of fabric, lots of expensive fabric. "Did you hear anything? A bell? A buzzer? A GONG?" Nope. Still didn't register.
Henny Penny and I, after getting matching thread and what not to go with, made our way up to the cash register. I lay the fabric out, everything is rung up, and the cashier says, "That can't be right!" I tell her that that most certainly can NOT be right. I'd be out of my mind to pay that much for a costume!!!
The cashier rings it up again! Yup! It's right! The grand total. I'm gonna make you guess. How much do you think it was that left me near tears as I handed over the credit card and spent the rest of the evening sick to my stomach?!
Fifty dollars? Nope! Keep going!!!!
Seventy-five? Keep going....
NO! I'm not kidding! Keep going!
All night I was sick to my stomach. You know the feeling. I know you do. Fess up!
The next morning I called my sister and lamented. "What am I going to do?? The SM is going to KILL ME!"
I started thinking. What could I sell? My truck? Our house? How could I make up for the huge dumb mistake I'd made? And how in the heck did all of this not even give me the tiniest of a, "Lady! Are you out of your cotton picking mind of a clue??"
One hundred dollars! Nope! I know!! I'm dead serious. Keep going!
After I got off of the phone with my sister, I sat on my bed trying to figure out how I could justify my daughter having a Halloween costume that cost the same as a wedding dress! (In my day). And the dang thing wouldn't even have french seams! I was just going to zig zag the bottom of the thing! I can't have my baby girl wearing a dress with zig zag that costs that amount of money!
One hundred fifty? You are getting closer but sadly, no........ keep going!
And then.... I remembered...... my sister in law's sister saying something about some fabric she'd gotten and they'd taken it back! Maybe, just maybe!! Oh please oh please oh please. Do you think they'd take it back?
I grabbed the bags of fabric and drove like mad to JoAnne's saying a prayer the entire way. PLEASE TAKE BACK MY HIDEOUS MISTAKE? PLEASE DON'T MAKE ME PAY RETRIBUTION FOR HAVING MY CONTROL TOP PANTY HOSE ON TOO TIGHT!
I walked in the store...... plopped down my fabric and asked, "Do you take back fabric? Please tell me that you do? Or I'll slit my wrists on your cutting table!"
They didn't want a messy table. They took back the fabric. Every blessed piece and the wings. Every penny that I'd been sick over, put back on my credit card. All...... One hundred........ eighty.........five........ dollars worth.
Yes, you just read that correctly. Korrie! I could hug and kiss ya for that post you'd written about taking back fabric. If it is over a yard they'll take it back. Well, my six pieces were WELL over a yard........
I got back in the car and Henny Penny asked me what we were going to do for a costume. I told her not to worry, we'd go to the 'Marts and I'd figure something out. We walked through the costumes and guess what? A bumble bee fairy costume! For nineteen bucks!
Two days before I'd have snorted at spending nineteen bucks on a 'Mart costume but that day. BARGAIN!
So, warning 3. Don't get emotional. It skews your judgement. Not that I have any personal experience with this...... just sayin'...... hypothetically.