Making memories one day at a time.......and then I write about it.

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Levi's Hands........

I don't know when I starting noticing hands.  I just know that I notice them.  Maybe because since I can remember I've been self conscious of mine.  In high school mine were always dry and my nails, I could never get them to grow.  Still can't.  I'd see other girls' hands with pretty nails, nice and soft, long fingers..... not short and stubby with big palms like mine.

Growing up we worked.  We worked all year long outside with our hands.  My hands looked it.

As I sit here typing a lot of the same envies are still there.  I'll never have nice nails.  My hands are dry.  My fingers still short and stubby with big palms.  When I am at home working they don't bother me but when I am out and about and see other women's hands, the nice manicured pretty hands, I get envious and want to hide mine.

I still work.  All year long with my hands.  My hands look it.

A man's hands are different.  Why in the world am I so fascinated by hands?  Because I'm odd.  The End! A man's hands should not be soft in my opinion.  I know it is becoming all the rage for men to get pedicures and fix their nails and the such.  A man's hands should be work worn.  They should be a bit rough.  When giving a hand shake it should be firm.   I'm sure this is all written in the gospel of hands somewhere and by not following is breaking some hand care commandment.

See?  I'm warped with the whole hand thing!!  Don't even get me started with feet.  They just disgust me..

Being fascinated with hands it is a wonder that I never noticed Levi's.  I mean I noticed them...... but I didn't 'notice' them until his pediatrician pointed some things out to me.  Like the fact that his fingers and toes are really short.  The pediatrician clicked off some term like he was checking off an everyday list of things to buy on his grocery list as he was checking Levi over.

I took Levi's hand into mine.   Yeah, I guess his fingers are abnormally short.  Hmmm.  I hadn't noticed nor did I notice that his toes are the same........   abnormally short.  There's a clinical term for it.  I don't remember what it is.

I guess I hadn't noticed because like everything else with Levi, unless someone else points it out or says something, I don't see him as others do.  To me when he tries to sign his name and has to hold down his fingers so his pinky will stay up to sign the letter "I" at the end of his name....... or when he is signing, "I love you" he has to hold his pinky up........  that is just one of the things that makes Levi so endearing....... I hadn't realized it was because of his little fingers.......

During church while we are sitting next to each other, I like to reach over and intertwine Levi's  fingers in between mine for a few seconds. He only lets me for a few seconds but, he lets me!   Understanding how Levi is and how he doesn't really let you hold him or touch him very much I can't explain what this means to me, to hold his little hand in mine for a few seconds.

Two hands intertwined.  Both with short stubby fingers.  Mine, and his............


  1. This is a beautiful post. And I will ruin my comment by telling you that I notice hands, too. But for a completely different and warped reason. I notice hand because of veins and how bulgy they are or if they have a nice bifurcation where I could easily jab an IV needle. It's the nurse in me. I can't help it. So if I ever grab your hand, I'm not getting fresh and you might just want to watch out. ;)

  2. Nat, LOL! You already have! You told me I have nice veins. :D

  3. Hi Rachel, thank you for stopping by my blog and leaving a wonderful post. Life is fragile, is it not.
    Hands, the nurse in me looks at hands for clues. Once had a patient tell me, I love your hands, you use them, you work with them, you care for people with them. So see the beauty in well worn hands.

  4. Hands are what make a person. I agree with Nancy. They make everyone's jobs and careers possible- writing, art, construction, music, commenting on other people's blogs :D, eating pizza, the list of the things that they do is practically endless!

  5. OK, Rachel, here's my hand fingers remind me of people (and my toes, too). Hard to explain, but it has to do with the shape of my fingers and nails (which are also, by the way short and stubby with tiny nails because I bit them all off for years) and the shape of people's heads and faces framed by their hair. OK. Can't even really believe I even tried to explain this.

  6. Nancy, You stopped by! This makes me happy. It's an odd thing, my obsession with hands. I love work worn hands.... on other people. My own..... maybe if my fingers were longer! :) It's like a hair thing. Those of us with natural curl want straight.... those with straight want curl...... those with stubby fingers want long...... those with long...... wait...... I guess it doesn't work. :) Joking aside, I think the compliment given to you is perfect and one that I would give and have given. I seriously do love work worn hands....... just not mine! :D Cuz I'm odd that way, and many other ways.

    Yes, life is fragile. We all need to be reminded of this from time to time so we value and cherish our relationships.

    Hanna, Agreed and agreed! So, quit complaining about my hands because I'd sure wish I had my stubby fingered work worn hands if I lost them! There. I won't complain about my hands ever again. (At least out loud.....)

    Donna, You are sooo funny! Mine as well name your big toe Rachel. That one's got my name all over it. From now on when you see your big toe, think of me. :D

  7. Really? You want to be the big toe? Maybe after I put some polish on....

  8. Donna, I don't WANT to be the big toe....... I AM the big toe.... In a few months I can be one of the skinnier toes....... today... I'm the big momma. The big kahoona!

    Red polish please.....

  9. I'm with you on the skinnier in a few far so good with the plan for taking better care of myself...
    Red it is!

  10. Melissa, What is sweet is your family! Love your Christmas card photo.

  11. Rachel and Donna, you completely crack me up. Really - laughing here. Now I will NEVER be able to see toes in the same way again. You have messed with my foot aversion. Now they're just going to make me giggle.

    Rachel, this is a beautiful post. And you are so right, when there is a child who has a "label", there seems to be so many sub-labels that come along for the ride. Like brachydactyly (looked it up - resourceful, not smart). Echolalic. Or whatever. NONE of them add up to the child, who is his or her own wonderful SELF.

  12. Oh Rachel - so much magic in such a small gesture, I understand completely how precious these small moments are and how much is conveyed it that brief treasured moment of hand holding x

  13. Wabi, Wow! Now you've got me running to the dictionary. :)

    This could go so many levels. We all carry around labels whether we've put them there ourselves or others have... we all have special needs and are handicapped in some way or another. If we could all look on each other's hearts and see past that.....

    As for the feet, glad we could help. :D

    Julie, Yes, I know that you understand completely and thoroughly. It is one of those small magic moments that helps get through the rougher moments. XXOO

  14. I understand all of this. One of the things I remember most about my mother, the most living, breathing detail - her hands. During church. Clean, strong, slim, and always with a slight scent of onion. Because of dinner. Which she was always making. But if I were going to do a portrait of her, it would be her hands, and her mouth and eyes in a smile.

    We never see each other, those who we love, the way others see them. I sometimes play a game with myself, and I look at people, like Roger or somebody, and try to see them the way his kids' friends would see him when they visit. Shocking.

    To see through the eyes of love: a gift of God.

  15. Kristen, You know how in movies like, "Pride and Prej." where the girls sit and look at themselves in the mirror and try to judge how they look or appear...... I can only imagine how I appear to others. :) I look in the mirror and OY!!


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