It is 5:15 AM. The alarm goes off and I let out a groan. Not possible. It can't be time to get up! I had had a horrid night of very little sleep. My thoughts screamed, "Go back to bed"! My resolve said, "Get up fatty"!
All warm and snuggly under the blankets, my nose cold from the cold air in my bedroom, I know I do not want to throw back the covers and enter the frozen world called January. I waddle over to the alarm and turn it off setting it for 6:00 AM for when Mr. T would need to be awakened by The SM.
The gym. I've never had a membership to a gym in my life! I'm not sure this could actually be called a gym but I have a membership and I belong and that which could be equated to hell begins at 5:45 AM. No equipment other than free weights, our own weight we are packing on our bodies, and an hour of sweat.
Back up it up Bessie. I've never belonged to a gym but I have for years worked out at home with different videos/DVDs,jogging,etc.
It has been a long time since I have 'worked out'. I've tried over the past few years since getting sick but I always end up back on the couch. I probably will this time as well but I can't stand how things are going south
and curdling so I'm going to the gym.
It's been tough. Not only physically but for my pride. I used to be in really great shape. I could kick pretty much anybodies trash when working out. Stamina. I had it. This week, as I've started up again I am winded/wasted/PATHETIC! A half hour into working out and I am pacing the sidelines trying not to throw up. Back and forth, back and forth, back and forth I pace gritting my teeth. No eye contact to the other ladies kicking my trash. Just me. Walking back and forth in the back of the room trying to get things to settle.
By the way, these are not teeny bopper teenage/college age students kicking my trash. These are women my age and quite a bit older. To say the least, I'm way impressed with what some of these hotty grandmas can do!
Today, pride was attacking me again. Time and time again I had to quit what ever we were doing. If we were running, I was always the last to get to the end. So slooooow! Depressing!
And then, I remembered this post.
Thank you! I needed that.
Tomorrow, when I go back, Pride! Be prepared to be kicked in the pants.
"If ever there is tomorrow when we're not together... there is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think............." — A.A. Milne
It's kind of sad that you have to go so early in the morning since that's the only "down" time. I admire you so much! I used to go to the gym faithfully and probably should still go...but...I'll just have to live vicariously through you. You'll do it for me as well, I just know it.
ReplyDeleteSo, next time you are there just repeat over and over, "I'm working out for two."
K, thx, bye!
What a wise friend you have. I love that post too.
ReplyDeleteKeep it up, Lady. You'll be kicking my trash in no time. Or maybe I'll get crazy enough to come gasp for air right along with you.
One step at a time and yes remind yourself of the effort to do even just a little bit and be nice to yourself! Our changing bodies are a challenge to deal with, I am constantly battling pride about mine as I go thru the dreaded menopause and thing are a changing...some good some bad...but still changing! I try to stay in the moment and focus on the little things too. I do have to say wouldn't summer be a better time to start??? Your winters are so cold I wouldn't want to get out of bed either! LOL
ReplyDeleteTami, I will! I will do it for you because for years as I've been on the couch, others have run for me. I know what it is like to want but not to be able to.
ReplyDeleteNat, I wish you would!! You know I'd love to have a work out buddy.
Jenni, That is just it! No one told me what my body would do after a hysterectomy! Wowza! Throw me forward into the future 20-30 years! On the other hand.... I'm pain free in that department. Not a bad thing.
Jody, Take it slow and easy. I need to take my own advice. Baby steps right? We can do this!!!
You are so silly. You are already a svelt little minx. You are already beautiful. And funny, and capable, and raising a houseful of heathens to their own good. You hold up the world. Do you have any free weights that come close to being that heavy? Girl, you ask for too much. You truly do. It's just a good thing that God in infinite in patience and humor as well as everything else, or he might get irritated - the little girl with her bowl out, constantly saying, "More?????"
ReplyDeleteI admire you for getting out of bed and going! Unless I have somewhere to go, I stay under those covers until I need to eat.
ReplyDeleteThis post goes hand-in-hand with your comment on Gerberta's "Christmas Break" post because they are both about pride.
ReplyDeleteI understand.
I used to be a swimmer--sleek and fast and strong. Now when I swim the water feels more like jello, and I am lumpy and slow and clumsy. I look at the lifeguards with a touch of envy. I used to look like them.
But in reality I wouldn't trade places with them.
So I sigh a little for what is lost and hug one of my children.
All of that said, I must tell you that I'm impressed that you're at the gym, choosing your future!
i say you should have gym time w/Mr. C after everyone leaves for school-don't get up early!!
ReplyDeleteMarseille, Mr. C NEEDS gym time. Not because of his weight obviously :D but for getting up and moving around. I look forward to warmer temps and getting back to the river trail. There was a time when no matter the weather we hit the river trail.... I'm getting old I guess. Not to mention the problems the river trail has been having of late with scary people on it! I used to feel safe on there.
ReplyDeleteWell, the former aerobics instructor in me wants to say, "slow down" through the work out. If they are running - march, etc. Then you won't be pacing in the back halfway through.
ReplyDeleteThe description of how hard it is to get up in the morning only confirms my choice to turn down the position of workout buddy. But I am now a member of same said gym and could POSSIBLY be convinced to show up to the early class on a rare occasion. Then you'll have someone's trash to kick.
Nice sentiment, Z.