Grocery Shopping on a Budget

Having spent many years going grocery shopping on a limited budget with chillin's in tow. I now have a PhD (Pretty Huge Distaste)in this department. Many have sought me out for advice and counseling. I have had a 99% success rate and today because it is 10-5-09, a day which must have meaning to someone in this big wide world I give you my advice for free. But only for a few short moments and then it goes back up to full price.

You have heard the rule many times, do not go grocery shopping when you are hungry. This is critical! So critical that I tell my clients the second you walk into a grocery store, go straight to the candy aisle, grab a package of Twizzlers, open the bag, take out a few pieces of licorice, and eat as you walk through the grocery store. I have found that peanut M&M's work well too. It just depends on how often you want to be putting your hand into the open bag while trying to load groceries.

If you have children with you, grab a box of the gooiest crackers or candy you can find. Rice Crispy treats are perfect. Just make sure it is something that when they bite into it, it snaps their jaws shut just as fast. Then, proceed with your grocery shopping. This takes care of wailing caterwauling children for the duration freeing you up so that you don't end up in the aisle with fly swatters beating your kids.

If you do these things you will have a 100 percent success rate. I did however have one client that this did not work for. You'll see why in a moment. There's always one....... Names have been changed to protect the innocent.

Bawlinda came into my office and related her experience. Here is what she said, "On Friday I went grocery shopping. I hadn't eaten anything in awhile. I remembered your counsel which has always helped me in the past so I beelined it straight to the candy aisle and grabbed a package of Twizzlers and ripped them open. I proceeded to walk down aisle after aisle trying to grocery shop but my mind was in such a state that I couldn't focus! At one point I found myself standing in front of a display of hot cocoa. So many to choose from. I couldn't decide which flavor so I put one of each into my cart. I continued on down the aisle and into the next. The baking aisle. I needed something in that aisle but I couldn't remember what it was. What I found was a sale sign for Guitard chocolate chips. The shelf was empty. The sale was really really good. Standing next to me loading shelves was a man stocking the shelves. I approached him and asked him if there were anymore in the back. He told me that he didn't know. He thought the store might be out. You can not imagine how this made me feel! I asked the man if he realized that the world was going to come to an end NOW! He was a kind man, or he was afraid of me, either way he left and said he'd see if he could find some in the back for me. I waited and a few minutes later he came back with a box. I grabbed the box from him thanking him to which he gave me a strange look. I told him, he wasn't planning on actually putting any of those on the shelf was he, and I took the chocolate chips and threw them into my cart along with the cans of hot cocoa.

I'm not sure how long I spent in the grocery store wandering up and down each aisle trying to figure out what it was I was supposed to put in my cart. When I made it to the check out and loaded my groceries onto the belt I still had no idea what I'd bought. All I knew was that it cost $130.00 and when the cashier asked me about the opened bag of Twizzlers I told her it was a shame paying full price for 1/2 a bag of candy".

I've been working with Bawlinda over the weekend and as of this morning she seems to be doing much better. Through much talking she admitted that she'd had a rough few days. Her handicapped son had had an attack and she was emotionally distraught over the situation. We agreed that not only should she not do any shopping but she shouldn't be out driving the next time she is an emotional basket case. This is why Chinese take out was invented. Next time, we're hoping for 100% success.