I'm having a Wii fit about the Wii

Doctor's orders. I'm to do physical therapy three times a week. Here's your prescription..have a nice day.

Just about as good a suggestion as when I was pregnant and had a gazillion little ones at home and the doctor would say, "you need to put your feet up and rest"..... Yaaaa riiiiight. I'm gonna work on that one!

Obviously, not plausible because you see, I have this wee one at home with me still that I kind of need to take care of and well.....some days I'm just not able to get out of the house and go and do that aquatics physical therapy ya know? I've got soaps to watch..or something.

Remember this post? About my rockin family training for and doing the triathlon? I mention it here too...... and here. Ya well.....guess what? I was training for it too and I really thought I was going to be able to do it and then well.....so after laying on the couch for two years and in bed for the last three months my muscles are kind of muscles? I'm not sure they can even be called that any more can they if there is no definition?

The physical therapy is supposed to help that. Among other things like repairing damaged nerves and stuff. I'd LIKE to throw on my running shoes like times of old and run out the door pounding my frustrations out on the pavement for a few miles or kick and box the heck out of those same frustrations. But no, no exercising or "over doing it".

So, last night my SM brings me home a Wii fit all wrapped up in smiles. "Hey honey, I heard that you can do yoga on this Wii fit and thought maybe you could try it!"......dead silence....SM standing at door with Wii fit still in hands as smile starts to fade.....

Me: Ummm, yoga. Yoga as in sit cross legged on a mat, eyes closed, while some bizarre music that sounds suspiciously like an angry bee buzzes around my head?

SM: Chuckling. Ya, something like that.

Me: As in breathe in......breathe out......visualizing harmony and peace all around.

SM: Still chuckling. You got it.

Me: YA WELL NO! Absolutely not, you know what happened last time I tried that breathing thing. Took that class. I breathed oh I breathed and I was good at it too and you remember what happened? A football came flying out my back side. No one told me that if I breathed like that I'd give birth to a gremlin and no one told me that if I got it wet it would multiply either! I had to figure THAT one out on my OWN. Seven gremlins later...........

SM: Shaking his head seriously concerned. Come on honey, let's just try it. (Gremlins chanting in the back ground. Go mom, go mom, go mom.......traiters.)

Me: Okay, I'll try it but it isn't going to work. Dumb hippy yoga zen trend......

So, we plug it in and it asks all sorts of questions and then asks me to stand on the Wii board thingy and then the thing has the gall to tell me in this stupid wobble head spandex wearing "trainer" voice that I am under weight, a wimp, and working at about the level of someone who is 43!

Me: This thing is a piece of junk! I can't believe you spent that much money on a stupid glorified bathroom scale that throws insults at me while wearing spandex!

SM: Laughing hideously and oh so ready for me to back hand him. Through the tears.....just give it a try. Come on, I'll do it with you.

Me: Fine, I'll show that spandex wearing wobble head a thing or two. Bring on the yoga! He's no idea who he's messin' with.

SM: Ummm, honey....it's not real. He's not real. He can't hear you!

Me: Don't mess with me, I know what's real and what's not! Bring it on. Show me your worst ya Yoga Nazi.

A half hour later......

SM: Honey, you need to shut that thing off. I'ts time for bed.

Me: Hush...Can't you see I'm breathing here? You're ruining my zen!